I don't know...

I know I have a boyfriend....and it's going great...but that still doesn't mean i don't remember...and think about the "previous" guy....especially because the hurt is still so real.....it really is unfair to my boyfriend though.....that i still think about everything and that sometimes i "shrink back" because of what the other guy did or said.....kind of like i'm punishing him for what he did...it seems so unfair....but you know what i've learned...i've learned that promises aren't kept...you can 't believe anything anyone tells you....especially a boyfriend...i mean obviously some things you can...but if they say "i'm gonna love you forever" or "i'll always be here for you".....ha. what a lie... just a plain out lie.....it'd almost be better that they didn't say it at all.....but my one friend and i were talking on the internet and listening to songs and its really creepy because two of these songs applied so well to my one situation..it was weird and depressing and almost made me cry at the same time when i listened to them...one of them "Good bye" by Miley Cyrus and "Sorry" by the Jonas Brothers (two bands i rarely listen to)


I remember the simple things
I remember till I cry
But the one thing I wish I'd forget
The memory I wanna forget
Is goodbye
--Miley


Broken hearts and last goodbyes
Restless nights
But lullabies helps make this pain go away
I realize I let you down
Told you that I'd be around
I'm building up the strength just to say

I'm Sorry
For breaking all the promises that I wasn't around to keep
It's all me,
This time is the last time that I'll ever beg you to stay
But your already on your way

Filled with sorrow, filled with pain
Knowing that I am to blame
For leaving your heart out in the rain
--Jonas Brothers


My response:

i'll keep remembering--
the only thing is
you never begged me to stay
you just pushed me away...




i've nothing else to say
for its impossible this way
to momentarily explain
all this hurting pain....




Good night.