People

Do you ever stop and just realize how many people affect and impact your life? I did tonight under the stars with my best friend. I've come to realize that this quote (i dont' think im wording it right but anyway it goes something like this) something about people walking into your life and its up to you who walks out of your life. Ive realized taht its not really up to us who walks out of our lives. To some extent it is up to us...but in reality its up to God and the other person. I've...had a person walk out of my life. Somone...so special to me and i didn't want him to walk out of my life but i could do nothing to stop him. So you see, you can't stop someone from walking out of your life. you just hope and pray that God brings them back in your life. and as hard as it may be to see if God doesn't bring them back into your life...then you kno that God is going to give you something so much better. no matter how much it hurts at the moment to know that there is a possiblity that, that person might not come back into your life. And sometimes for that person to come back into your life you just have to let go first and move on and leave your future in the hands of the One who knows best, God. Obviously, everyone struggles with that tho, especially me, but i know things will work out for the better and i just have to choose the path God leads me to. We all have a choice you know. So when your heart is telling you something follow it because if your heart is filled with God then you will be moving in the right direction. When i look at my life in the past like 2 or so years and i see what has happened, i'm hurt, but then i think of all the other people who have been hurt way more than me and have had to deal with so much more. it makes my problem feel so small but yet its so significant to me.


I feel as though i've lost someone that is/was supposed to be in my life...for longer than he was. maybe God will bring him back in my life. I can only hope and pray that He does however i know that if He doesnt' i'm going to eventually be okay with that fact. It's wierd how when you open your heart up to someone it always manages to get broken in some way. in my case, it's been shattered into a million pieces and i feel it will take me a long time until i finally get all those pieces back together again but i guess thats just the healing process of it all. And that brings me to another point. Best Friends. Where i would be without my best friends. ha. I have had so many memories with my best friends theres too many to count and lately ive been thinking about all the memories i've made with them like painting the table to put in our swing set and making a pulley to pull stuff up in the swing set with the triplets minus their brother (haha) and a more recent one, walking on the road in the dark singing as loud as we could "Jesus loves Me, and Jesus Loves the Little Children" beacuse we were scared out of our minds and then running from a tractor we thought was chasing us until we were safely laying in the grass looking up at the stares with my other best friend. It's just incredible how God has placed each person in our lives to make us feel happy or well...not so happy...but thats beside the point. Every person who has come into my life and given me so many memories to look back on and yes some of them hurt to remember (not because i wish i hadn't made the memories at all) *Sigh.* I don't know. ( and i have no idea how i went from what i was first talking about to this right now but oh well)


On a side note. The stars were beautiful tonight. My friend and i were talking about how incredible it would be to go to outerspace but yet how much more complicated it would make things. For instance, the stars alone are amazing to look at but think if you were to go to outerspace and see all the other amazing things God has created up there. I think the earth is big but if i saw the universe/galaxy/whatever it is, i dont' think i could even begin to comprehend it (not that i can now) I don't think any human being can fully grasp how big God is, no one can fathom whats beyond the universe and whatever else is out there (no idea if i used the word 'fathom' right but i like the word lol, its from the one song, 'no one can fathom the depths of your love' i think thats what it says anyways i think its from the song indescribable. haha) But seriously its just amazing when you think about it and sometimes its kinda scary if you really think about it in a way and for some people But How can anyone even begin to say that the earth was not created by God? There is no way you could explain it except for totally and completely amazing and that doesn't even cover the half of it.


Well, I guess this post is long enough for now. I have to get to bed anymore. Work in the morning you know *so excited* (being sarcastic of course lol) I'll end with some quotes.


"No matter how much something hurts.. somehow letting go of it seems to hurt worse.."



"Friends are like balloons; once you let them go, you might not get them back. Sometimes we get so busy with our own lives and problems that we may not even notice that we've let them fly away. Sometimes we are so caught up in who's right and who's wrong that we forget what's right and wrong. Sometimes we just don't realize what real friendship means until it is too late. I don't want to let that happen so I'm gonna tie you to my heart so I
never lose you."



"It's funny how certain things trigger memories.Like, songs, smells, stuff like that.Some make you sad, and some capture you in a momentary deja vu.You can just close your eyes, and you are then captured in the past."

^ this is what im talking about with the memories. Like tonight while i was laying in the grass, the weather, the place, and the smell of the air alone just brought me so many memories. Wouldn't it be so nice if we coudl revisit the past and do things over? That would be so great in some cases but thats not how God works, which is a good thing so i guess i'll never revisist the past and change things but oh well God's taking care of that =] because if we could do that we wouldn't grow and learn from our mistakes. God has it all figured out we just have to let His plan take its course.

God truly is amazing isn't He?

God Bless!!